Now, I can see why these online dating sites are relevant & attractive

While I spend research time clicking thru the various online dating sites (match.com, eharmony.com, etc.) to understand the offerings across these sites (from big to small), I tried my luck via the spots I'm familiar with - bars, supermarkets, parks, galleries, etc.  There were some lovely ladies at these spots during my eye candy search this past weekend.  Unfortunately, some looked married/engaged, dating someone already, or that I can't tell if they are single or not.  What is even more unfortunate is my cajones is not as big & bold as they were in my younger years.  Be it the years of marriage, out of shape from lack of exercise, or the lack of practice chatting it up with lovely ladies with the intent to date them, my confidence is just not up to par.  I am nervous and often don't know what to say and that is likely due to lack of confidence and fear of rejection.  Even if I muster up the bravado to chat up with a lovely lady, I often can't tell if they are single & looking or not - as the single ladies radar is apparent not working that well either.

With online dating sites, one doesn't have to guess if the people on the sites are looking to date someone or if one has to have, at the onset, the courage to chat up a lovely lady.  The selection pool is large and the segmentation/niche is extensive and relevant - such as there are ones tailored to divorced singles like myself.  The initial interface via online chats and emails offers a gradual warming up phase that is less pressure than a face to face blind date of sorts encounter.  Perfect for my pace to look around and warm up to someone.

Online sites, here I come.

Wow, certain areas of dating have changed alot

The big FOUR uh O is around the corner.  A few years ago, turning 40 is more zzzzzzzzzz than anything.  However, not so when it's after a divorce, split custody of the kids, and a long separation from that thing called exercise.  When you're happily married (I thought so till the divorce), have kids, bought a residence, stable job, and long enough leash to do guy things (watch sports, hang out with buddies at bars, go to casinos, mess around with the car,..), life was good, predictable, and EASY.  I've adjusted and am more accepting of the post-divorce life.  What's done is done and it's time to keep moving on.  One hurdle to that moving on was getting back into the dating scene and realizing "oh boy, dating and dating dynamics have changed a lot since getting married".

No surprise, the internet and social networks are among the biggest drivers to what has changed the dating scheme.  The rules of engagement got changed due to this use of technology.  But the biggest change is how many ways people now can find others to chat, be-friend, date, casual fling, etc..  Back in my dating years, there wasn't anything like twitter, facebook, and gazillion of on-line dating sites.  Instead of the "call me", now it's that plus text me, email me, tweet me, and the date details might be posted onto and discussed by others on facebook pages.

One area that has surprised and impressed me is the search results out of search engines - as far as breadth of dating niches being well represented on these various on-line dating sites.  I found a dating site with Asian women.  Then out of curiosity, looked at what else is there - looking at less common areas.  Found vegetarian singles, older men looking for younger women, and even stumbled on one for HIV positive people.  Guess there are lots of people looking at those dating niches else there wouldn't be that many sites catering to them.

While I try to catch up to this new tech stuff for meeting dates, I'll see if I have any dumb luck at the bars, supermarkets, etc. to see if there are ladies looking for a chubby cute Asian dude.  Oh yeah, I'll get to the gym one of these days soon - yeah, soon.